Love

My favorite quote by me:  "I have been around the block and through the alley".  

The best wisdom in life comes from our failures and the adjustments taken to prevent future failures.  Mistakes are OK as long as repeats are few.  One more piece of advice:  People are ever evolving as they grow older .... some people remain loyal to their partner/husband/wife; others step into the darkness and may decide they want something/someone new.  Even perfect couples can loose their moral compasses.

Case in point: Two great friends of mine were married for 20 years. I thought so much of each, I flew several thousand miles to be at their rehearsal dinner, wedding, and reception. She was my AA at age 21 and he was my best golfing buddy. He and I grilled and BBQ for all our friends at least once a month.  They appeared to be that 'perfect' couple. As they got into their forties, he began having problems with growing older.  One day they both went to work, she came home and he didn't. He left only taking the clothes on his back...never contacted her again.  As it always does, the truth finally came out, indirectly.  He satisfied his insecurities, whatever they were, by taking up with a 18 year old girl that worked with him.  The irony is both these people grew up in the same city; went to school together; moved to Tx. together; their families knew each other very well; and his brother married her other sister.

Again people change as they grow older, especially from age 40-50, expect it and be prepared for the worst to happen. Most men want to take up with a younger woman and many women want a different life once their kids out of the house.

Bottom line, honest communications may prevent this and it may not. We always need to unconditionally allow our partners to be/become what they want to be, which, sometimes means an end of the present and the beginning of a different future but each going or forced to go in directions. 

Another couple I know made this agreement when they got married: Each would go on a week's vacation by themselves and each would decide if they wanted to stay married to the other. Bottom line, they are still married after 30 + years because each has the freedom to leave the other once a year.  What works best in a relationship: Whatever keeps both parties unconditionally in love, happy, and having fun as the live each day in bliss. 

Real Love sustains when both parties are allowed to be/become whatever they want.  No locks can prevent this evolution from occurring; it will happen with our without each others blessings.

Posted via email from kleerstreem's posterous